Thorns Beneath the Rose: Unveiling the Shadows of Jealousy

Thorns Beneath the Rose: Unveiling the Shadows of Jealousy

In the sprawling garden of human emotions, jealousy is perhaps the most deceptive thorn. Unlike anger, which flares and fades, or sadness, which seeks healing, jealousy wears a mask—it smiles on the surface while brewing storms beneath. It is often disguised in politeness, concealed in admiration, yet it devours peace like termites on polished wood.

Whether it is the envy of a colleague’s promotion, the glint in someone else’s jewellery, the applause another receives, or the social adoration showered on someone seemingly less deserving—jealousy lingers like an uninvited ghost in the banquet hall of our minds.

The Psychology Behind the Green-Eyed Monster

From a psychological perspective, jealousy is born out of low self-esteem, insecurity, and perceived inferiority. Psychologists often refer to it as an “emotional response to a perceived threat to one’s self-esteem or status.” It’s not always about what others have—it’s about what we feel we lack.

Social comparison theory, introduced by psychologist Leon Festinger, explains how humans evaluate their own worth based on comparisons with others. When these comparisons are unfavourable, the mind spirals into discontent and envy. Jealousy thus becomes a mirror—showing us not what we desire, but what we fear we cannot attain.

Moreover, in a world increasingly curated by social media and superficial validation, individuals are constantly exposed to others’ highlight reels—happy families, exotic vacations, elegant wardrobes, and career milestones. This bombardment fuels a psychological storm: “Why not me?” becomes a haunting question.

Social Roots and Cultural Conditioning

Society plays an insidious role in cultivating envy. From early childhood, children are compared—marks, medals, manners. “Look at Sharmaji’s son,” becomes a lifelong echo. Social structures, instead of nurturing uniqueness, often reward conformity and competition. This creates a pressure-cooker of ambition, comparison, and silent resentment.

In adulthood, the social arena is no different. Communities celebrate success but secretly mourn others’ victories. Offices breed unspoken rivalries, friendships sour in competition, and neighbourhoods simmer with passive comparisons. Wealth, beauty, charisma, and influence become benchmarks, and those who have them often find themselves targets of hidden animosity.

At its worst, jealousy manifests not just as internal dissatisfaction, but as destructive action: subtle manipulations, false accusations, broken trust, sabotage in workplaces, and even calculated isolation in social circles. People who feel “less” often feel justified in pulling others down.

Philosophical and Ethical Reflections

Jealousy is not just a feeling—it is a moral failing when allowed to grow unchecked. The Bhagavad Gita condemns Matsarya (envy) as a destroyer of peace and spiritual elevation. “He who is free from envy, who is friendly and compassionate towards all beings, who is free from the feelings of ‘I’ and ‘mine’—that devotee is dear to Me,” says Lord Krishna.

From the Buddhist lens, jealousy (Issa) is one of the Five Hindrances to enlightenment. It is rooted in attachment and illusion. To covet what is not yours is to suffer. True liberation lies in Mudita—sympathetic joy, the ability to rejoice in others’ happiness.

Christian theology regards envy as one of the Seven Deadly Sins, as it erodes charity and love. It distances one not only from others but from grace itself.

Healing the Poison: A Call to Grace

If jealousy is a poison, gratitude is the antidote. When we begin to appreciate our own blessings—no matter how modest—they grow in value. Practising mindfulness, affirming our strengths, and recognising that each soul walks a different path can shift the lens from bitterness to beauty.

Let us replace comparison with compassion, resentment with respect, and rivalry with reverence.

Let us not be architects of others’ downfall, but humble custodians of our own soul.

Echoes from the Heart

What joy is left in stealing light,
When stars are born to share the night?
A richer robe may drape his frame—
Yet envy’s fire will burn the same.

Her fortune bloomed, your garden bare,
Yet seasons change with silent care.
Rejoice in roses others grow—
Your time shall come, your seeds shall sow.

Jealousy is a thief in disguise,
With honeyed speech and hollow eyes.
Guard your heart from envy’s call,
Or you may rise—only to fall.